Tastes Like Halloween

I like Holidays waaaaaay more than I should. And not just the “big” holidays either (as you might have gathered from my Shamrock Shake post back in MAR). I blame The Social Parental Unit for this. You see, we had a HUGE picture window in the front of the house and EVERY holiday brought another display for the window. X-Mas, The Fourth, St. Paddy's, Easter, Valentine's Day, Memorial Day, even the beginning of baseball season brought new decorations for the house. So, yes, for the better part of the year the front of my house looked like the window display of a florist shop (minus the flowers) and, of course, I thought this was totally normal because, well, it's the only home I ever knew.

The first year I moved out I repeated the process. I happily bought my OWN decorations for the new apartment and plastered them all over the place for various holidays. However, I quickly figured something out: TAKING decorations down (and storing them) sucks ba||s >_< As such, my decorations are more scaled back these days (but still undoubtedly exceeding the “norm” for my demographic) however, when it comes to food, well, that's a different story. You don't have to put away and store food, now do you?!?!

Right off the bat, I'm not pretending that ANY of this stuff is particularly high-end or gourmet and fully admit that's high on the cheese factor. But that's OK. If you don't want to try a Jack In The Box Pumpkin Shake or Jones Candy Corn Soda, don't. But know that the stuff listed is pretty damn tasty if not kitschy.

I'm a sucker for pumpkin and, fortunately, our forefathers (or, at the very least, people that wrote the history of what our forefathers did) had the foresight to include pumpkins in Turkey Day, so the pumpkin flavor stretches well beyond OCT. So, if you buy a six-pack of pumpkin beer for Halloween and find it noxious, guess what? Bring a Holiday Five-Pack to a Halloween Party, a College Football Game or Thanksgiving and it's gone and you look like a thoughtful guest. The Hottie prefers a local Pumpkin Brew from Buffalo Bill's and it has pretty wide distribution on the Left Coast although she warms “it tastes VERY pumpkin-y” but, hey, if you're a purist, you probably aren't willing to give pumpkin beer a shot anyways :p Blue Moon and Sea Dog also make pumpkin beers with decent distribution as does Anheiser Busch under the Jack's Pumpkin label. I'm not going to bash Bud, per se, but just be warned that while it's meant to LOOK like a microbrew, it not...so don't spend microbrew $$$ on it.

If you're German (or simply abhor the idea of pumpkin beer) that's okay too. There are LOTS of true, non-seasonal microbrews that fit the Halloween theme: Arrogant Bastard, Dead Guy, Pete's Wicked, the Hobgoblin & Scarecrow brews from Wytchwood among others. In fact, most places that you'd buy hard-to-find liquor from (i.e. BevMo and Cost Plus in these parts) will have displays FEATURING beer with names or packaging that's lends itself to All Hollows Eve. Now, this option is going to cost you more $$$ since a lot of bottles retail for five bucks (or more) a pop but, in general, it's worth it AND a good excuse to try a couple beers you haven't had before.

Sadly, wine doesn't fare as well for Halloween. Thankfully there is no pumpkin wine (yet /shudder) but most spooky/halloween wines that we've tried aren't much better than Two-Buck Chuck at Trader Joe's. The bottles for Vampyre Merlot or the Evil Wines might look good, but that's about it. And, once you pour the wine out, it's just middle-of-the-road wine that you spent $$$ on. At least the pumpkin beer still TASTES halloweeny and the microbrew in the wicked bottle still tastes like a high end craftbrew after it's poured. Still, if you INSIST on getting a Halloweeny wine, go for the Black Cat Reisling from Germany. It's decent, not particularly expensive AND the black cat shaped bottle is seriously kewl and you'll prolly hang on to it for years to come.

On the non-alcoholic front, there are a surprising number of choices beyond kid friendly “punch” of dubious origin. Jones soda is always a solid choice and has wide distribution of it's Halloween sodas through Target. Four, eight-ounce cans in Halloween packaging will only put you back a buck fifty and come in favors like Candy Corn, Lemon Drop-Dead and Buried Pomegranate. And, like the pumkpin brews, if you try a can and don't like it, you've got spares to take to a party. Or, even better, they're good mixers for a drink! Just do what The Meat Guy (who found them too sweet) suggested and add coordinating vodka or schnapps and BAM instant mixed drink! In the half-sized cans they're ideal for this purpose. Beyond Jones, there are plenty of botiquey sodas that have offerings like Black Lemonade that you'll tend to find at high-end grocers.

On the hot beverage front, Spiced or Mulled Cider is a pretty common option. The pre-made Spiced Apple Cider at Trader Joe's is a fave of The Hottie's but, honestly, almost any cider warmed on the stove with the appropriate spices will do. Bonus, it makes the house smell r-e-a-l-l-y- good while it's simmering. If cider isn't your thing, Pumpkin Tea (Adagio & Lupica both have season varieties) and Pumpkin Coffee aren't that hard to find if you know where to look but my current favorite is Halloween Hot Cocoa. What makes it Halloween, you ask? Well, it's an odd white crystalline powder that turns bright orange when mixed with Hot H2O. Now, there is NO chocolate in this creation and it doesn't really taste like cocoa but, whatever is in it IS tasty and it's hard to beat a steaming cup of orange liquid with whipped cream on the Halloween-o-meter. Both Crate & Barrel and Sur La Table carry the seasonal beverage for as little as $1.25/pouch. Give it a shot and, if you don't like it, plop some pumpkin schnapps in it :D

EDIT: This year Papa Murphy's colored the pizza dough orange for their Pepperoni Jack O'Lantern Pizza (it's normally uncolored). At $7.99 it's always a crowd pleaser BUT make sure you phone in ahead - Halloween (along with the Super Bowl) is their busiest night of the year...

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Live Blog: Happy B-Day To Me!

When you go to Luce for no reason other than it's THU and Michael Mina so often the Maitre'd recognizes you, WHAT do you do for a special occasion meal? That's what I have to ask myself every B-Day. I can't really complain about last year, I went to Aqua for their Lunch Tasting Menu (back when they had and still served lunch) and a local place, Pappo, for dinner. You've never heard of Pappo, but it merits a ZAGAT 26 and is arguably the best food here on Silicon Island, but I digress...

This year the plan is to hit two of my perennial favorites. With The Grumpy Parental Unit involved I don't want to visit places TOO far out there (both in terms of cuisine and location) and my A to Z has ALREADY sent me to plenty of new places this year. So Bouchon for lunch and dinner at One Market for their tasting menu it is. It's a FRI, so The Hottie took the day off and I made the One Market reservations well in advance. Nomnomnom...

9:43 A.M. – Now normally, my B-Day B-Fast begins with something(s) The Hottie bought the day before in The City and then heats up along with some tea or hot cocoa. If it hadn't been firmly established before, The Hottie does NOT and canNOT cook. Period. Canned soup and microwave meals are pretty much her limit, but she can heat up chocolate croissants and bacon cheddar scones with the best of them!

This year, however, I knew what I was having in advance: Ham Biscuits. I've never had this staple of The South, but The Meat Guy (who's also never had them) sent me two dozen of them as my B-Day gift, so having them as B-Fast on my birthday was a no-brainer. They're from Callies of Charleston and, supposedly, are some of the best Ham Biscuits known to man. They're a bit smaller than I had imagined, really, REALLY savory and, surprisingly, not particularly hammy. The Hottie's addition to my breakfast is a Japanese “Pound Cake” in one of the kewlest boxes I've ever seen. Seriously, this box is a keeper. It was purchased from a Japanese candy shop in The City where EVERYTHING on the packaging is in Japanese. So, yeah, it's an authentic bean paste cake. Yum? Anyways, it's about what would expect from a Japanese “cake”: small, pretty, dry, crumbly and only the teeniest, tiniest bit of sweetness. My favorite? No, but some Pumpkin Spice tea pairs rather nicely with it and, honestly, the subtle flavors are a pretty solid yin to the incredibly flavorful yang of the ham biscuits.

10:04 A.M. - Not food related BUT we watched Modern Family on DVR while chowing down B-Fast. If you aren't watching this show already, you should. I LOL IRL and snort more during that half-hour than the rest of the week combined. Modern Family. ABC. WED. 9:00. Have I ever let you down before?

11:34 A.M. - Starting out a little later than I had planned, but the GPS (The best invention EVER) says we'll arrive @ Bouchon @ 12:32, so we're GTG. Itinerary includes Bouchon (and, of course, the Bakery), a couple of Gourmet-type stores (Napastyle, Sign of the Bear and the Sonoma Cheese Factory) and prolly a couple of wineries (Cline and Gloria Ferrer).

11:42 A.M. - The GPS lies. Traffic has ground to a halt for no apparent reason. Seriously, there shouldn't be any traffic on the road this time of day >_< In just eight minutes we've tacked five more minutes on the arrival time...

11:48 A.M. - Well there's the culprit - a carbeque. Looks like they're cleaning up after the burning car that was on the morning news. Lanes closed and people in orange vests spreading tons of that powder that sucks up liquids. The Hottie claims that the carbeque was on the Bay Bridge, not the approach to the Bay Bridge, so this is something else. I ignore her, because a carbeque makes a better story.

12:46 P.M. - We make it to an extremely packed Bouchon a good fifteen minutes after our reservations but since Bouchon is Bouchon our table is still waiting for us. I've gone through at least two-thirds of the Bouchon menu but my B-Day brings me two good specials on the old-school chalkboard: Salmon Tartare and Boudin Noir (a.k.a. Blood Sausage) - I'm a Happy Panda. The Hottie predictably goes for her go-to dish, the Croque Madame, but also gets a chalkboard special, Escagot.

12:50 P.M. - The Hottie informs me that Ashley is at one of the tables behind me. Since I don't KNOW any Ashleys, I'm a bit confused. Ashley Who? Ashley from Top Chef. I turn around and, sure enough, it IS the Top Chef contestant. Upon further review, she's dining with two other contestants Preeti and (just eliminated last night) Laurine. The "celeb" sighting isn't nearly as interesting to me as the fact that they are HERE and this season takes place in Las Vegas which tells me that the Finale -which is always in a different city- might well be in Yountville!!! Yes, they're eliminated, BUT Top Chef has a history of bringing back the eliminated contestants to help as Sous Chefs for the finale, so it makes sense. Granted, both Preeti and Laurine are "local", so they might be friends with Ashley who just came to visit, but I doubt it. Hopefully, I'll bump into Padma at Bouchon Bakery and then I'll KNOW I'm right :D

12:58 P.M. - The Hottie is SURE that Ashley keeps looking at her. Seemingly every time she looks at the Top Chef crew, Ashley is looking at her. Granted, their seats ARE facing each other but I remind The Hottie of two things: 1)She's a smoking-hot redhead and 2)Ashley likes girls. She's prolly just checking her out the same way guys tend to do. "Oh yeah. I forgot". So, if for some reason Ashley stumbles upon this blog, the Hot Redhead @ Bouchon in the orange Tory Burch-ian dress says "Hi!"

1:10 P.M. - Bouchon recently started using local wineries as "House Wines" that they serve by the glass, carafe or half carafe. Today's is a Yountville Semillion that The Lush -err- The Hottie got a half carafe of. Math not being her strong suit, she didn't realize a half carafe = 500 ml (i.e. 2/3 of a full bottle of wine). Somebody's going to fall asleep in the car...



2:05 P.M. - ZOMG!!! Birthday wishes DO come true (no, not Padma). I was hoping against hope that Bouchon Bakery might have some Halloween type creations and they do! Selections include a pumpkin "cupcake", that looks nothing like a conventional cupcake, pumpkinseed brittle, giant shortbread cookies decorated with a candy web and spider, bat shaped TKOs (Thomas Kellers interpretation of an Oreo) and, The Hotties fave, a giant candy apple. It should surprise nobody reading this blog that I get one of each.

2:22 P.M. Having visited Michael Chiarello's Napastyle recently, there isn't a whole lot on my shopping list. Regardless, I do overfill a 1l bottle of Unfiltered Sicilain EVOO. Yeah...that's messy. Still, picking your own apothecary-type bottle and filling it with one of six different olive oils from a giant metal dispenser is pretty damn kewl. Messy...but kewl.

3:28 P.M. If your local, old school hardware store and Sur La Table had a love child, it would be Sign of the Bear in Downtown Sonoma. Thousands upon thousands of kitchen gadgets you never knew existed or needed (until now) randomly crammed into narrow aisles. I get a cutting board that folds into a scoop, a reversible, silicone jigger, a double sided rubber spatula/scraper thingy and a turkey baster with a giant silicone turkey as the bulb. Oh, did I mention they're ALL bright orange (the predominant color of my kitchen)?

3:50 P.M. I can't go to Sonoma without visiting the Sonoma Jack Cheese Factory. I've been coming here since I was a wee lad and they actually made the cheese on the premises. They've since moved the cheese making operations and replaced it with froo-froo wine/cheese boutiquey retail space but the sandwiches (featuring their cheese, of course) are still a picnic must and they have over twenty cheeses to try. There's fudge to sample too but cheese>fudge and we need to get home. The Hottie forgot how hot the Habenaro Jack cheese was. Heh. Silly girl.

6:19 P.M. My birthday loot is, predictably, foodcentric as has been the case since...high school...maybe even earlier? The new Ad Hoc cookbook, the reprinted (and no longer $200) Fat Duck cookbook, a pair of Himalayan Salt Plates and a set of Staub Mini-Cocoettes are among the haul. Non food items include stuffed murlocs, a WoW Loot Card (the Ogre Pinata) and a Cal Polo Shirt!

7:12 P.M. Chef Mark Dommen vexes me!!! You see, I've NEVER had his tasting menu because, frankly, there's ALWAYS some special going on that looks even BETTER. Dine About Town, a knock-off of Dine About Town or, the most frequent offender, The Daily Roast >_< Could I interest you in a tasty Pork Saddle today? Or perhaps a 10 oz. Filet of Beef slow-roasted in our fire pit! He always makes me change my mind. Well today I went to get his tasting menu, dammit! So I refuse to be tempted by...oooooooo...what's this? The Weekly Beast? A new FRI and SAT only special during OCT where he picks a different animal and makes a 5-course Head to Hoof tasting menu. And tonight is...Lamb!!! DAMN YOU MARK DOMMEN!!! DAMN YOU!!!!!!

So, yeah, I'm having lamb tonight. Did I mention the wine pairing is only $20? So, yeah, The Hottie is having more wine. Whee!

9:55 P.M. Even though I'm stuffed and, yes, there was a lamb dessert (Sheep's Milk Ricotta Fritters) we still have to have B-Day Cake. It's a tradition, after all. Now, I'm still fuzzy on the details but, apparently, there was some sort of mishap on my birthday cake and the box was too short and/or it got slammed around in the back seat and the frosting got smudged on the lid or some junk. So The Grumpy Parental Unit decided in his infinite wisdom to just smear the entire top rather than leave it be with a couple dents. I can still make out some balloons, but whatever writing was once there looks like hyperactive finger painting hit with an Adobe blur filter. I have no clue. I gave up trying to figure out his "logic" many moons ago. Bottom Line: It's a tasty three-layer chocolate cake from the same old-school bakery my B-Day Cake comes from EVERY year. And The Puppy likes the finger painting frosting once we scrape it off, so it's all good.

Happy Birthday To Me.

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LUCE HAZ A STAR!!!

ZOMGWTFBBQ!!! I can hardly believe it!!! I JUST (literally, 3 min ago) opened my shiny new Michelin Guide, found the page that listed the Starred Restaurants and, upon seeing my fave/underrated place on the list, exclaimed "LUCE GOT A STAAAAAAR!" out loud IRL. My next thought was to start texting people to tell them the news...and decided this was easier :p Remember, this was the place that was First Runner-Up for my RESTAURANT THAT MOST DESERVES A MICHELIN STAR (BUT DOESN'T HAVE ONE) AWARD. /happydance. And, for the record, the winners of said award (Bouchon & B&B Ristorante) are in Vegas which doesn't get a guide this year, so we'll never know if I was right about them too...

Much more to follow, including a new Live Blog tomorrow that you won't want to miss...

Edit: The Professional Liar will be happy to know that HIS fave/underrated restaurant, Chevalier, made the Michelin Guide and even received a . That makes us both happy pandas...

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Look Out Below + Justifying The 9

It occurred to me that some of you (and by some, I mean all) probably didn't notice last week that I added some new features to the blog. You hit your bookmark, saw the cute picture of The Puppy and moved along to your next time-wasting bookmark, incorrectly assuming there was nothing new. Shame on you! Now scroll down, look at the new content and then come back here. Go on! I'll wait...

…

Done? Good. So, now you know that other parts of the blog get updates (like A to Z) even if I don't have some overly-long entry on the Main Page. So, if you do a drive-by, you might miss something and I'm NOT going to post here EVERY time I change something. You have been warned.

So, obviously, the most interesting content is the ranking of Th3 n1n3. And, like most lists it's sure to piss off plenty of people. 'ZOMGBBQ!!! HOW DARE YOU HAVE CYRUS RANKED LAST!!!! U R A N00B!!!!' my comments section would read (if I allowed commenting, that is). First off, this is MY top nine EXPERIENCES and only for THIS year. That doesn't mean that Micheal Mina > Redd > Guy Savoy. It means my experience(s) @ Micheal Mina this year were superior to my visits to Redd and Guy Savoy THIS YEAR. You had different experiences and, six months from now, I could very well have different experiences at the exact same places, but I can only go but what happened to me. Ordering the wrong dish, having a server in the weeds, being sat next to loud/annoying people on cell phones and such can ruin a fine meal at a truly great restaurant. It happens. But enough of my “disclaimer”, on to why I ranked places where I did...

Number one was a no-brainer. There are a lot of little things I like that really help enhance a meal. Extra intemezzo courses, things done tableside, cheese courses, visits from the chef, molecular gastronomy (done correctly – not just for the sake of doing molecular gastronomy) are some of those things and ALL of them happened @ Madrona Manor. Plus it happened to be our anniversary at a restaurant that we had visited on our honeymoon. It was pretty much a perfect meal.

Madrona also shows that, even though my blog is named after the Michelin Guide, I don't pay much heed to their scoring system. I mean, ranking single-star Madrona Manor ABOVE three-star Joel Robuchon and two-star Guy Savoy, Michael Mina AND Cyrus! Sacre Blue! Just keep in mind the Michelin Guide is just that...a guide. While some might view it as a bible, I think it's healthier to view it as a very descriptive map. The difference between a two-star and a one-star is mostly subjective anyways...which brings us to number two and number three.

We've gone to Michael Mina so many times in '09 (mostly because of their ridiculously affordable Pre-Theater Menu) that we practically have our own table. The hostess recognizes us, the mater die recognizes us as does the waitstaff. Needless to say, that is very kewl. Went went to The Dining Room once and had one of the best meals of the year with a-l-m-o-s-t French Laundry type ninja servers. To me, EITHER would make a solid number two but I give the edge to Micheal Mina for consistency.

That a three-star restaurant ranked as “low” as four is a bit weird even to me (and I wrote the list), but I simply had a better time at Madrona, Mina and the Ritz-Carlton. That being said, Robuchon was a VERY memorable meal with courses that looked like each dish had it's own creative director. Number five, Sushi-Zo, was on the opposite side of the spectrum. Tiny plate after tiny plate of fresher-than-should-be-possible seafood and rice with the terse instructions of “Soy sauce!!!” or “No soy sauce, please!!!”. It's a trip and, without a doubt, the best sushi I've ever consumed.

At this point, the list gets a lot more murky. Madrona, Mina, Ritz-Carlton, Robuchon and Sushi-Zo were EASILY the best five places I went this year. They were memorable, had impeccable service and creative, perfectly executed dishes that, to this day, I still crave and probably remember them as being even better than they actually were. I might struggle with who's #2 vs. #4, but they're all Top Five. Picking six though nine was kid of like pulling teeth. I really, really liked Gordon Ramsay BUT that was only for High Tea...so not really a fair assessment. Same is true of Providence BUT that was only for dessert. The Village Pub was truly memorable and left me wanting more but was it really better than Guy Savoy's bread pairing or the Champagne and Caviar Cart @ Cyrus? This is where the list stopped being fun >_<

Redd, like Mina, gets high marks for consistently great food on multiple visits (it's become my Go-To place in Kellerville). Guy Savoy merits number seven for the service, bread and cheese carts. Plus his son, Frank, loved my silver velvet Armani jacket and the Foodie A to Z thing. So, yeah, he knows about the blog too. (Hi Frank!). The Plumed Horse ranks number eight in SPITE of so-so service. It wasn't bad...just nowhere near the ninjalike servers of the restaurants higher on the list. Foodwise though, the tasting menu was spectacular. Tighten up a few things and it moves up the list. Which brings us to number nine, Cyrus. Now MANY people would have you believe that Cyrus is the equal, if not superior, to The French Laundry. I don't see it. Aside from two-renowned chefs cooking in the NorCal Wine Country, I don't see the parallels and, frankly, I think the comparisons hurt Cyrus. With all the hype and fanfare I was EXPECTING a transcendent experience and I got a tasting menu with...two, maybe, three good courses. It was still interesting and memorable, but on the expectations vs. reality scale it really under delivered. Sorry.

But, like I said, six through nine was really a crap shoot, so if it makes you feel any better, go ahead and pretend that you fave was #6 or JUST missed the list because, frankly, you could six through nine in a Yahtzee dice cup and re-number them and I wouldn't have much to quibble about. Redd, Cyrus, The Plumed Horse, Guy Savoy along with the others mentioned above are ALL worthy of being an anybody's Top Ten list.

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